Finding the silver lining
My blog posts about hunkering down during the COVID-19 pandemic have been all doom and gloom. And, I mean, rightfully so. Emergency rooms are overwhelmed; people are dying. It is a scary time.
But, through it all, one thought keeps coming to the front of my brain: I am SO lucky.
I'm in the best possible situation to get through this. R and I both have jobs that are allowing us to telework, limiting our exposure to other people. We don't have children, so we're not trying to walk the parenting/working tightrope that so many others are navigating. We live in an area where we can get delivery from a variety of restaurants pretty easily. And we also have access to all kinds of technology that allows us to maintain ties with our friends and family.
As a result -- my increased time with my husband, my reduced commute time, the ability to work in sweatpants, the time for long dog walks in nice weather, the time to practice my accordion -- I'm finding myself actually (and I feel guilty admitting this) kind of... freaking happy?! It seems incongruous with the rest of the world outside. I shouldn't feel this way. But I do.
I still have an underlying current of anxiety. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up anytime I'm outside and another person gets too close to me, and every time we have to bring something into the house I stress out about germs hitching a ride on the cardboard. But once I'm back inside, everything's been wiped down and I've washed my hands, a calm settles over me. I'm in my happy place in here, with my husband and my dogs... and my accordion.
Things are OK!